I can’t believe I just had to look my boss in the face and tell her “Someone shit on the seat.” I have never had that hard of a ten year old boy laughing fit in my life.

So ladies and gentlemen, I work with a seat shitting bitch. I have never had a moment of more personal and professional shame in this building that this very moment and I’ve lived through bankruptcy, deceit, scandal and a touch of impeachment.

This shit trumps it all.

Literally.